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Dear Santa,

Seeing as you’ve been Santa since long before the digital revolution, you must have trouble keeping up with technology. You’re probably feeling intense pressure to write daily blog updates or build your friend list on MySpace. A million sites make your email addy public, and that means you get more spam than Bill Gates. Modern kids aren’t capable of physically mailing something — they wouldn’t know a stamp if it pasted itself to their butts and sent them to China.

Because we’re a tech-savvy bunch, we considered digital solutions to help you manage our Christmas list. Our design and development teams created an interactive Flash game that calculated naughty versus nice, but it kept crashing when it hit the cookie-and-milk matrix. The PMs offered to write up a report and add milestones and email updates, but they got distracted by their overflowing Inboxes and ringing phones. The Web producers designed customized XML schemas that templatized our lists, but then they found some shiny Javascript to look at and just wandered off. (You know how Web producers are.)

So in lieu of an awesome digital solution, we thought we’d make it easy on you and go old school with a plain old list. Thankfully, no one at Plexipixel was naughty this year, so you can leave your coal lumps at home.

• Allen C. desires nothing less than world peace. But if that seems like a tall order given the current state of world affairs, a Canon 40D camera will do.
• Amie S. would like a goat. But please don’t deliver it directly to her apartment. Instead, buy it through Heifer, a non-profit that lets you purchase gifts for families in need around the world. Her goat will then provide food and wool for an entire community.
• Devi P. needs only bags of money, preferably the sort that come pre-imprinted with dollar signs on them.
• Drake B. wants a Rascal ConvertAble 600F with flames painted on the sides, because using your legs is for suckers.
• Ian H. longs for a 1962 Fender Bass VI, in Lake Placid Blue because 1.) he’s never played one before and 2.) 4 out of 5 scientists agree that it is actually the best bass ever.
• Your aching back will thank you after you see Ian R.’s wish list: he wants nothing. Nothing is the only gift that doesn’t take up space or need batteries and it won’t break or shrink. Best of all, he won’t miss it if he regifts it.
• Jesse H. would like free health care (we assume he means for everyone) and a new paint job for his van. 
• Jesse R. wants a pony. And his innocence back. You’ll have to ask him if/how those two things are related.
• John T. hopes you’ll bring him a baby Bigfoot and the complete set of “Teaching your Bigfoot American Sign Language” DVDs. That way, he can start Bigfoot learning early and they can eventually have endless conversations about the wilderness and politics.
• Get your pen ready, because Joshua S. has technical specs for his desired Macbook: 2.2GHz core 2 duo processor, 4 GB of ram, and a 160 GB hard drive. Got that?
• Kristi T. wants a gigantic snow storm and sledding party. Or Warren Miller’s Extreme Storm and Virtual Sledding Party for Wii (and a Wii to play it on).
• Lisa S. is keeping it simple with her request for an iPhone.
• Matt T. needs Fewture EX Chogokin Getter Robo Getters 1, 2 and 3. For these truly nerdy-ass gifts and the nerdy-ass gift connoisseur, only the entire set will do.
• Paola R. is giving you two options: either a Wii or a new wardrobe. You pick.
• Ryan W. hopes to zoom around on a pair of new quad rollerskates.
• Tizzy A. wants a President that can correctly pronounce the world “nuclear.”
• Vicky T. longs for designer fake eye-lashes from Shu Uemura, and a trip to Japan on which to display them. If you could arrange it so that it coincided with the Sapporo Snow Festival, that’d be great. She’s waited her whole life to see the resident snow monkeys whooping it up in their little stone hot tub.

Speaking of which, the entire studio would like a hot tub, and maybe an in-house barista and a weekly delivery from Cupcake Royale, as well as continued good health and happiness for all the people who work here. (But if you have to pick just one of those, go for the cupcakes.) If you want to take us up on any of our technical offers, you know where to find us.

Sincerely,
The Plexipixel team